Advice On Dealing With Friends Who Don't Value You

Hello to you my chums!

Today I bring to you my first ever advice post! I know in my last post I said I was doing my Formal Experience, however I couldn't come up with anything substantial or worth reading and I didn't want to post something for the purpose of just posting something. 

So, alas, I am here to advise you on how to deal with shitty friends who don't value you as a person. Not all of these will work for you as everybody is different, however these are just the things that have helped me in the past.

Source: https://38.media.tumblr.com/7bdb293e878c6e2618c32a09baa60e9f/tumblr_inline_mw5r5tdUNS1solpi8.jpg

Throughout my life I've had quite a few struggles with friends and things but I feel like now I'm in a good position to give you some handy tips on what to do if you're not happy with your friends. 

My first tip is to talk about it. Whether you talk about it with all of your friends in a group situation or with someone in particular who you trust, it's up to you. This helped me a lot when I was dealing with friend issues in the past. Shout out to Zozo, my bestie from the westie, for always being there when I needed you. Keeping your feelings bottled up inside is not an effective way to live your life, this applies in any situation. There's no point in being bitter about something that you have a problem with and the best way to prevent this from happening is talking about it.Sitting in your room on your own stewing over it isn't going to make you any better. You could even write it in a diary if you aren't comfortable talking about it with someone. 

If your 'friends' make fun or pick on you don't show them that it's effecting you. All they want to do is get a reaction out of you and by not giving it to them eventually they will get bored of it. Now, there's a fine line between taking the Mickey out of someone for fun and being just plain, straight out rude. A bit of friendly piss of take is healthy but if it gets to the point where it's making you upset that's where a line has been crossed. If its a constant flow of insults my best advice is to just not show them that its effecting you. Don't give them the satisfaction of knowing that they're hurting you. This is when my first piece of advice comes into play, talk about the way it's making you feel. It will lift a huge weight off your shoulders. 

Find something that makes you happy. Whether it's books, music, a band, a TV show, a celebrity, whatever it may be, if it makes you happy, hold onto it. This sounds so cringey but I used to be one of the saddest kids when I was going through problems with my friendships but I discovered a band called The Wanted and they became my safe haven. Music has the power to change everything, and if you've never experienced something like this it can be a weird concept to grasp. I used to cry pretty much every day at school over something that someone might have said but I would come home and listen to The Wanted or watch their videos and it would instantly change my mood. I'm not going to lie and say this will fix all of your problems but it definitely will help. I know it helped me and it's helped a bunch of other people I know as well.

  If you are having troubles with your friends that are genuinely preventing you from even wanting to see them or talk to them, they're probably not the people for you. Some people have temporary problems where their friends will go through phases and issues start to occur but if its a constant battle for you, it's not worth staying friends with these people. You should be surrounding yourself with people who build you up to watch you succeed, not people who build you up just to tear you down. Even if you've been friends with someone for your whole life, if they are making your life miserable it's not healthy to keep them in it. The number of years you've been friends with someone doesn't define the strength of your friendship, it just means you've been friends for a really long time. It's okay to distance yourself from people who aren't beneficial to your existence. 

So, there we have it, those are my tips on dealing with crappy friends! I hope I've helped at least one person out there.

If you are dealing with things like this and it's making you depressed and it's leading to you to or think about hurting yourself please get into contact with the Children's Helpline (http://www.kidshelp.com.au/) or any suitable alternative to seek help.

This is me, signin' off.

Actually By Ashlee xxx